When God gives you an out!
What is a toxic relationship? According to an article written by Elizabeth Scott, (2023), “What To Know If You’re Concerned About a Toxic Relationship,” a toxic relationship is “When your well-being is threatened in some way — emotionally, psychologically, and even physically. Any relationship that makes you feel worse rather than better can become toxic over time” (Scott, 2023).
Some people feel that because they love that person, they must stay in the situation, and if there is a child(ren) involved, this only heightens the intensity of the toxic relationship. In the NIV Bible, I Corinthians 10:13 tells us, “No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.”
What this Bible verse is telling us, and do take heed folks, is that the context of this comment is about avoiding sin, and not assuming that salvation brings us immunity from the earthly consequences of our own behaviors. It also serves as a warning to those who are arrogant or careless about their standing in Christ. Temptation is a routine part of life and our desire to sin can sometimes feel so much more powerful than our desire to do what is right before God. What if, in any given scenario, we cannot resist, we have no other real choice than to sin? God at times, puts us in a position where resistance is impossible. We go through trials and tribulations and yes, everything is absolutely a test, but know too, God does not put no more on us than we can bear, and He gives His toughest battles to His toughest soldiers, meaning that it may hurt and confuse us for a while, maybe even throw us off focus of what’s more important, and that’s serving and living for God and His kingdom. Therefore, never stay somewhere or with someone if the relationship or the environment is toxic, or both, walk away without looking back. When and if God removes that person from your life, He’s done so for a good reason(s), and if you, based on free will, because He does give us that, or because of your flesh being weak, allows that person back into your life, then believe the situation isn’t going to get better, it only gets worse and worse each time.
If you are the type of person who also stays in a toxic relationship because of fear, the Bible offers reassurance because overcoming any given temptation is entirely possible. This is true for every Christian and non-Christian. First, Paul points out that none of us are uniquely tempted by the toxicity of sin, in the sense that our desire to sin, or whatever unique form it takes for us, is common and ordinary. It has been experienced by countless others down through the generations. It’s called a generational curse. Exodus 34:7 (KJV) says, “Keeping mercy for thousands, forgiving iniquity and transgression and sin, and that will by no means clear the guilty; visiting the iniquity of the fathers upon the children, and upon the children’s children, unto the third and to the fourth generation.” The skeletons in our closet or our family’s closet, weren’t put there by our dad or our grandmother or our great-aunt. They’re the work of our First Parents. We were in Adam when he broke God’s commandment. We were condemned with him. But this is not the end of the story. Just as we were in Adam when he fell from grace, so now, if we believe in Jesus, we are in Christ through faith. This is what Paul means when he says that “one man [Jesus] did obey. This is why many people will be made right with God.”
When it comes to deciding if you’ll stay in a toxic situation, understand, we are ALL, individually, responsible for our own decisions. Common sense tells us that behavior and attitude problems tend to run in families. Just like physical characteristics of height, weight, hair color, and complexion. In the same way, certain types of sin can pass from generation to generation. This is particularly true of addictive behaviors such as alcoholism, drugs, domestic abuse, physical and sexual abuse (which might become ingrained in the psychological legacy of certain families), rape, or mental health problems. However, none of this should be viewed in terms of an irreversible “curse.” Spiritual deliverance is available to everyone who sincerely calls upon the name of the Lord.
Secondly, our God is still for us. He loves us. If you feel like giving up or “throwing in the towel,” DON’T. It will get better, and it does get easier. Pick your head up my brother, pick your head up my sister, this is not the ending that God has planned for you or your LIFE. You have a PURPOSE. You have a God-filled calling and duty on your life. You have a light inside of you that is ready to come forth and shine brightly. Stop letting the toxicity of sin dim your light or steal it altogether. One way that God helps believers, and those who truly want to believe, is by actively working in us to keep us from ever being tempted beyond what we can resist. We might not always believe we can overcome temptation, or leave that toxic relationship or environment, but God promises that we can, by the power of the Holy Spirit. Satan might try to encourage us to see some temptations as irresistible, but God will always make a way of escape out of whatever temptation stands before us. If we look for a way to say. “NO,” to whatever sin compels us, God promises we will find it. In some cases, that might mean literally [escaping] from a situation, as Joseph ran from his master’s wife (Genesis 39:7-12). Until next time folks, stay prayed up and forever be blessed!!
Source: Scott, E. (2023). What to know if you’re concerned about a toxic relationship. “How to spot the warning signs of toxic relationships.” Https://www.verywellmind.com/toxic-relationships-4174665#:~:text=A%20relationship%20is%20toxic%20when,can%20become%20toxic%20over%20time.
